A Swiffer a Day...

Lesson Two


Martha's Daily Checklist
Page 23

(This list has nothing to do with daily Diet Coke consumption, making out like 8th graders, shopping sprees, weekly tabloids, manis/pedis or anything else I wish was a daily requirement. Boo!)


I may be a novice 'homemaker' but I am savvy enough to know that the beginning is typically a good place to start. And to my surprise Martha begins her preface with a Daily Checklist. My love for Martha grew exponentially as I read each bullet point.

I am completely obsessed with lists; Buddy Lists, Best-Dressed List, To-Do List, Shopping List, Best Kissers Lists (Oh, wait maybe that is just something I do)! I have been known to write many an email in bullet point fashion, hand write a long list of activities, and most recently thumbing lists on my iPhone's Notepad feature. The high I get from crossing off something on my list can be compared to purchasing that perfect something, realizing it is on sale then BAM pulling out a 'Take an Additional 40% Off Coupon' or spotting the sexiest shoe that will make you flashback to Carrie (in a somewhat tragic haircut) saying, "Helloooo, Lover!!!"
Martha's Daily Checklist consists of six simple steps to maintaining a clean living space. Here comes the bullet points...

• Make the Bed-I wish you could hear my mother's voice yelling, "Jennifer!!! Make your bed!!" I love my bed. I love snuggling in bed. I love bedding. I love throw pillows. I love down. I do not love making my bed. I like hitting the snooze button and prefer those five minutes of blissful sleep as opposed to five minutes of fixing sheets, pillows and fixing comforters. (Side note, I hate a flat sheet. What is the point? Why would one want a barrier from the softness of the down?) This is the current state of my bed in my 'Seaside Retreat' themed bedroom.

• Manage Clutter-This seems like common sense but after a quick tour of Apt. 4b I spotted many hurricane clutter hot spots. Martha recommends putting items back in their respective homes after leaving each room. I think I need to start building homes for most of my common misplaced items. A personal mini version of Habitat for Humanity.

• Sort the Mail-It is 2010 and snail mail is not exactly what it used to be in the 80's of my childhood but Martha has a point. We get the mail, toss it on the coffee table, and it starts to pile up, mix up and well clutter the living room. The Val-Packs, CB2 catalogs, and 900 Chinese Food Menus simply take-over. Martha says to sort daily into four piles, personal, bills, catalogs, and filing. She also recommends throwing out items immediately. My mother goes a step further and advises to have a small paper shredder in the mail sorting area of your apartment.
  

• Clean as you Cook-I want to tell Martha, I have no choice. I am sans dishwasher or counter space so cleaning as I cook is a necessity. Stay tuned for my next blog on how to hand wish dishes which will include my first Vlog featuring my ever so popular roommate. Isn't he just adorable?

• Wipe up Spills while They're Fresh-I am infamous for causing spills, knocking things down and well tripping in very public places. Martha recommends cleaning up a spill ASAP. Reacting to the spill faster than FEMA reacted to Hurricane Katrina. My top three most infamous spills:

1. Sophomore year at Boston College in the Lower Live Dining Hall, in the midst of a dramatic hand gesture, I knocked over my basketball player sized Sprite. The Sprite filled the table and spread toward Dana and Ally. I froze, laughed and Dana cleaned up the Sprite. Even then Dana was already more Martha.
2. Senior Year at Boston College (Are you picking up a theme?)dressed in 80's apparel for Dance through the Decades, I arrived at the Roxy and within seconds spilled my drink all over Ally in her 50's apparel. Again, I froze.
3. And last but not least-Setting: The Dudas Wedding, I am wearing silk shantung in vermilion. The reception has just begun and then gonk (A la Nene) I drop my dressing filled salad all over my dress. Dana laughs. I freeze. Dana then spills champagne all over her hot pink stapless-ness.

Pre-Spillage

• Sweep the Kitchen Floor- Which brings me to the title of this post. To Swiffer or to Sweep?!? That is the question. I prefer a Swiffer. I love seeing the dust gathered on the Swiffer pad. I feel such a sense of accomplishment. I also recommend hitting up Target for the Bullseye brand pads as they are 1/2 the price with 100% the same efficiency,
  

• Difficulty-3 out of 5. (Judging from consistently following through on each task each day)
  
• Execution-Thus far I have only de-cluttered and sorted the mail so I can only give myself C.
  
• Fun Factor-I am hoping these tasks become more fun and less like something my mother would yell from downstairs to me while I played with a group of friends. Can you think of anything worse than, " Jennifer, can I see you in the other room?" BUH!
  

ONTO LESSON NUMBER 3!!
(With assistance from oh so adorable roommate who prefers to remain nameless on the interweb. No 'Welcome to Facebook!' for him)